Most experts agree that the number one struggle for any relationship is in the area of communication. Sometimes just being honest, vulnerable, and willing to talk through difficult things is challenging. Healthy communication is hard work, but it’s vital to any relationship. The good news is, there’s hope in this area.
Through joining a Freedom group, Marshal and Candyce experienced a transformation in their marriage and family. Today, they share their story of what brought them to the end of their rope, and how God moved in their hearts to re-establish communication to save their marriage.
“From the moment Marshal and I met it was instant love. In a short 15 months we dated, were engaged, and got married.
Marshal came into our relationship with a son, Blake, and was recently divorced with emotional trauma from his previous marriage. I came into this relationship with so many walls built up, but we were having the time of our lives together. Shortly after getting married we found out we were pregnant.
The joy and excitement quickly faded when I became seriously ill during the pregnancy. Marshal had the responsibility of taking care of me, managing the household, working full time, going to school full time, and helping Blake through this new family transition. All this on top of the fear he was feeling about his new wife and unborn child literally fighting to stay alive.
Our emotions were so high and volatile.
With everything I was going through, I had no room to even consider thinking about what Marshal was going through. Marshal just shut down, communication stopped, and frustration set in.
Fast forward 5 years and, while we still loved each other, we fought non-stop. Both of us refused to give up on our marriage and vowed to be better for our kids—our family was worth it. We decided to get involved at Milestone and lean into God. We decided to join a Freedom group because, well, we needed help.
We had no clue what we were getting ourselves into!
Being honest with each other in every study, no matter how hard it was to acknowledge all the hurts and shame we brought into our marriage, was really challenging, but it was also so freeing. God said to me, forgive him, and listen to him. The very week that I forgave my husband and began to listen to him, all the hurt, trauma, and anger was gone.
For the first time in our marriage, we were both able to listen to one another.
We both were able to hear and receive what was being said and communication started again. Freedom saved our marriage, our family, and each of us individually.
Since Freedom, we are still growing and working through things that pop up, but we are growing together with God in the center of our family. Almost 7 years into our marriage, we are now experiencing our ‘Honeymoon’ stage’ because we can now talk to each other and say what needs to be said. This has been so liberating!”
With open and honest communication, Candyce and Marshal now have vision for the future of their marriage: that their house would be a peaceful home and their marriage would reflect God’s design. What a great reminder that there’s hope for any relationship, no matter how far gone.
If you’re walking through a crisis or feel hopeless in your marriage, know this: God’s in the business of restoration. We’ve seen so many marriages and families rebuilt and brought back to life by doing things His way.
Your vision for the future gives you power in the present!